Mungkin aku jatuh cinta pada perasaan jatuh cinta.

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Assalamualaikum, y’all!

Soooo the title used above was a quote taken from an Indonesian movie called What They Don’t Talk About When They Talk About Love (I know, the title is hella long). In short, it’s a movie about a group of students with disabilities embarking on a journey to experience the taste of love. It was narrated that a blind girl (played by Ayushita) is falling in love with her school’s janitor, who is mute (played by Nicholas Saputra. You won’t believe it’s him here). Just imagine, the girl cannot see the boy at all, while the boy is unable to tell anything about himself to the girl. How do they communicate, then? How do they know each other’s stories? How does love even present between them? What a difficult circumstance, don’t you think?

Well maybe that’s what love is: there could be no logical reason, exact explanation of how, when, or where it could form. You only know it when it’s already there. If someone asks why I love my, ehem, husband, I’m not sure if I can give them satisfying answers. I guess, to love someone or something goes beyond the reasons. As quoted from Paulo Coelho, “One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving.” As simple as that.

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I got greedy. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, holding your wrinkled hands.

Well, it doesn’t mean that we can disregard other qualities brought by our beloved ones. Or that we should accept them whatever they do (even the bad ones). No no no, I think that only makes the ‘love is blind‘ thing perpetuates and that’s not a good sign. I do believe that we should accept our spouse for who and what they are, but we should always remember that they’re just humans, too. They could be wrong, unkind, and full of flaws at times. After all, if we want to unite forever and enter the Jannah together, it should be our duty to remind each other whenever we stray out of God.

Love could be blind, maybe, but we shouldn’t. That’s why God gives us a pair of eyes, such that they could help us see whom we love sensibly.

Couple nights ago, I came across a podcast by Menjadi Manusia and listened to one of its track, which turns out really beautiful. Here it is Cinta yang Tak Dibahas Orang.

The lyrics, scoring, intonation. All perfect. I love this piece so so so much that I’m willing to write the full excerpt:

Cinta yang Tak Dibahas Orang

Aku tak pernah jatuh cinta kepadamu
Aku hanya mencintaimu saja tanpa ada jatuhnya
Sebab jatuh ialah ketidaksengajaan
Sementara aku mencintaimu dengan penuh sengaja
Dengan kesadaran dan segenap akal sehatku
Akal yang mampu menjaga kita agar tetap senantiasa sehat

Aku akan mencintai diriku sendiri
Sebab aku harus merasa layak menerima cinta yang kau beri
Jika aku tidak cukup mencintai diriku sendiri
Maka cinta darimu takkan pula kurasa cukup
Aku akan mencintai diriku sendiri lebih layak lagi
Sebab kau pantas dicintai dengan layak

Aku tak berbahagia bersamamu
Sebab hidup tak kan pernah mudah
Kehidupan bukanlah pabrik penghasil keinginan dan kebahagiaan
Bukan pula ladang yang mataharinya selalu cerah bersinar
Sebab hidup tak kan pernah berhenti menekan
Menempa kita yang sedang berusaha untuk terus bertahan

Sayang,
Kita bersama bukanlah untuk berbahagia
Melainkan untuk senantiasa belajar
Serta tumbuh menjadi manusia yang tangguh

Sayang,
Aku akan mencintaimu
Dengan sisi-sisi cinta yang lain
Cinta yang tak pernah dibahas orang

I really love the part about loving yourself first, long long before loving someone else. Face yourself first, selesaikan urusan dengan dirimu sendiri dulu. Only then, you can love yourself – and then someone else. I’m trying to tell this to my inner demons like every single day, and I hope someday I’ll find the answer and finally love the-not-perfect-but-so-beautiful soul of mine entirely, just like what Kim Seokjin said.

So, are you in love today? I hope so, at least with yourself.
Have a good day, Love you! ♡

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One thought on “Mungkin aku jatuh cinta pada perasaan jatuh cinta.

  1. yah,, that’s so right
    terlalu banyak org yang lupa untuk mencintai dirinya sendiri terlebih dahulu, sehingga saat mencintai orang lain, ia lalu memaksa diri untuk merubah dirinya sendiri menjadi orang lain

    Like

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